don’t talk to me about struggle until your headphones only work if you hold them in a certain position
Accordion to a recent survey, replacing words with the names of musical instruments in a sentence often goes undetected.
im so fucking angry
when u make hot chocolate and take it out of te microwave and the handle is 2000 degrees i created u i gave u life why must u hurt me
im not single im kraft® singlewas the ® even necessary
yes i do not want to go to jail
why do people get so mad about puns? they’re literally the nicest kind of humor. they make nobody feel bad. it’s just clever. sometimes it’s original. learn to like puns. don’t let society run your life
last night i found the most perfect christmas card of all time
i bought it, but i am keeping it for myself.
reminder to self: just because you can stay up until 5 in the morning doesn’t mean you should
*txts back 20 days later & picks up the conversation where we left off as if no time has passed and without an excuse*